Beauty: Who Defines?

Well, we all know the saying “Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder”- Margaret Wolfe Hungerford. Yes! this quote is true but to a certain extent. There are people that still look in the mirror and believe that they are ugly or not good enough. It is either the notion their environment has succeeded selling to them or the group of people they have decided to hang around. Humans are very quick to classify people based on their appearances. Think about it.. Even when you were younger, the so-called “pretty girls” are the ones you wanted to be your friends. Where did we learn that from, we do not know!

I believe everyone walks a totally different path in life. Some have it smoother than others. I remember when I was in secondary school, I was not popular at all. To be honest, I was just happy being the one who just had my own group of friends who did their own thing. There were days where I was bullied and robbed of my confidence and I am sure I was not the only one but it did not stop that the fact that I did not have a high view of myself at a young age.

Now to think of it we were all young people from different backgrounds and trying to impose it on others. 

Yes, it was, but thank God for wisdom! When university came my mindset shifted, I knew this was another chance to reset my life, mindset and identity. I began to choose my friends wisely. Anyone that talked down on me or try to over-esteem themselves around me were instantly eliminated. I began to behold the beauty I saw within myself and let it exude out of me. 

Sadly, not everyone went the same route as I did. However, it is never too late to reset your standards, mindset, appearance. Look within yourself figure out what and who you do not need in your life. There are people that come into your life and things become better all of a sudden. Then there are some that make it a mess and leave you in it. This is something that is not taught in our school system but has to be self-taught. Wisdom is a great deal in knowing who you are, what defines you and who defines you.

Be the best version of you! 

Love Always,

Liz Fashanu

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Dear Beloved Woman,

confident woman in Christ

Dear Beloved Woman,

Growing up as a woman is not the easiest thing to do. Though it has been said so many times, unless you actually go through it, you would not understand how deep it truly is. We go through so many stages in life from as early as eight years old to as young as fifty. It is a lot to take on if you are not prepared and whoever is?

For years I believed that confidence was only available for those who were born with it.

Growing up I never felt confident. In groups of people, I would feel shy and nervous, standing up in front of the class was an absolute NO, I could not think of anything worse. When teachers would put me on the spot, I would be stuttering and pretty much want the ground to swallow me up.

In my late teens and early twenties would be when I decided it was time for me to really sort this self-confidence thing out!

Listening to one of my favourite podcasts at the moment Preach It Sis, had me thinking about my own personal journey to getting my confidence to where it is now.

Being born a woman is beauty and strength already in itself. We are women dripping in wisdom, God has said she is more precious that rubies, absolutely nothing can be compared to it (Proverbs 3:15-16). “She” referenced in those verses actually refers back to wisdom in verse 13, meaning that wisdom is more precious than rubies and nothing can compare with her. I absolutely love the idea that “she” referring to a woman is more precious than rubies as well, and I think that although that is a true statement relating to our worth as a daughter of God, these verses specifically reference wisdom.

Take the time to know who you are in Christ, that will then give you the confidence to do or be anything!

I just want to encourage you to let that confidence radiate from the inside out and trust that you will notice a better change in yourself. There are a number of young women who suffer from depression because they feel they do not fit the standard of beauty constantly being portrayed. We have heard the news of young girls committing suicide because someone they knew or maybe even did not know was constantly making fun of them. That does not have to happen anymore. As we have seen this past year, depression is an issue that even celebrities have and can end up taking a turn for the worst. Some fail to realise how serious it is and how easily it can be triggered.

As women, please realise the only way to live an honestly happy and productive life is to first be CONFIDENT in yourself inside out and outside in. You will push yourself to the limits because of the confidence God has given you!

Look yourself in the mirror, know that you are made in the image of our Heavenly father. You are unique, beautiful, and was created with grace. Sometimes we as women become lost, lost in our world of chaos. Sometimes we forget to be still, and we move so fast into something else. Be still, patient, and be present in the moment that you are experiencing. Give all your worries to God because He cares for you. Give your prayer life a boost. He never puts you through anything you can not handle. Allow Him to lead, and you follow!

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do”. Ephesians 2:10


Liz Fashanu

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